Cheeky Charades

Image taken from google search

Recently I was involved in helping to plan some games for the N.E.mation! 10 wrap party with Mint Leong, and we thought that a 'simple' game of charades would be something fun to do. So our theme for this game was action phrases.

However, if you are as irritating as me, you would definitely want to think of some challenging phrases which would be really funny to watch the participants try to act out.

So with the help of some of my lame and pun-ny friends, here's a list of charade phrases [All PG safe] that came after the seemingly innocent example of "Throwing a ball"...

1. Counting Rice

2. Eating noodles with a spoon [contributed by Smith Leong]

3. Washing an elephant

4. Dancing on hot coal

5. Feeding your goldfish

6. Soccer with binoculars

7. Watching paint dry

8. Swimming with whales

9. Singing with the showerhead [contributed by Smith Leong]

10. Riding a unicycle

11. Swatting flies with newspaper

12. Building a tree house

13. Being afraid of mirrors

14. Juggling 7 durians

15. Flying a UFO

16. Washing Rapunzel's hair

17. Petting a flea

18. Singing while underwater

19. Reading a dictionary

20. Queuing for Hello Kitty

21. Playing Charades

22. Looking for big foot

23. Shouting at the TV [contributed by Smith Leong]

24. Rolling in mud [contributed by Ying Zi]

25. Fighting with chopsticks [contributed by Smith Leong]

26. Walking blind dogs [contributed by Smith Leong]

27. Drying wet tissue paper

28. Singing to birds

29. Washing ice cubes

30. Drinking goat's milk

31. Cooking Sambal Chilli [contributed by Mint Leong]

32. Dyeing leg hair

33. Watching a KPOP mv [contributed by Mint Leong]

34. Synchronised sleeping [contributed by Mint Leong]

35. Studying a food menu

36. Delivering a stamp

37. Arranging sand

38. Choosing pebbles [contributed by Mint Leong]

39. Buying money

40. Colouring comic books

Oh, and while we are on the topic of N.E.mation! 10, don't forget to check out my co-written posts on about what our teams have been up to during the 2nd week of production!

Our first go at co-writing! N.E.mation! 10 is back again!

Having had the honor of being part of some of the previous seasons of N.E.mation!, I was obviously delighted when they offered me a chance to come back again as one of this year's ambassadors. 

N.E.mation! is a digital animation competition organized by Nexus to express their thoughts on Total Defence using creative storytelling and animation! Having prior experience in animation, the finalists of all the pervious seasons of N.E.mation! Have been able to produce broadcast quality animation clips that were aired on free-to-air channels such as YouTube.

But this year, we are doing things a little differently. Instead of Mint and I taking 2 teams each, we are going to try something we have never done before. Co-writing! So I have become the back seat driver of Mint's blog!

So we last week, we went down to Nanyang Polytechnic to met up with the students from our 2 teams, Team Cedar3 and Team ZLS. Read up what went down from the links below!

I went bald after following hair growth tips from Elegant Beauti!

*Please read disclaimer near the bottom of this post

This is a totally ridiculous review about hair loss. Read all the way to the end to find out why.

I've always been having trouble with my hair. It never had a healthy shine, was always short and spiky, and the strands were as thin as the rubber bands that are used to bundle my takeaway fried kway teow from the coffee shop below my place.

No, I'm not talking about the hair on my head. I'm referring to the locks under my underarms. But all that was going to change after I found this health and beauty website!

I was surfing aimlessly around the internet and happened to chance upon this health and beauty website called Elegant Beauti. And on their website, they had this post that boasted a miracle home treatment that was proven to help men solve all their hair problems!

No fancy medications, no expensive spa treatments, all I needed to do was do 100 pushups, 100 situps, 100 squats and run 10 km every day!

Thinking that it was too good to be true, I decided to give it a go. And after just 4 days of forcing myself to finish this special exercise regime, I immediately started to see instant results! 4 luscious, long, thick and shiny strands of hair had popped out of my underarm out of nowhere!

Obviously I was ecstatic, and this instant results gave me more motivation to follow through the regime towards a future of thick, luscious bushes of underarm hedges under both my arms! For the first 2 weeks, strands of hair were sprouting up from my armpits like bean sprouts. But this was not meant to last...

From somewhere in the middle of my third week into the programme, I noticed that my armpit hairs started to fall off literally in batches of 20 or more. Just look at the photo of 2 of these batches! I could not believe what was happening! 

Out of desperation, I doubled the number of exercises suggested by the website from that day. Although I felt like I had just been ran over by a steam roller after every session, I know that this was for the best. Or so I thought...

One night, while I was casually standing in front of my camera waiting for something random but super interesting to happen, I suddenly felt a surge of strength from within. This feeling kept growing and growing until I could not keep it in any more.

I let out a thunderous shout which shattered all the glass windows of the buildings around me. All hairs on all parts of my body suddenly turned bright yellow in colour, and stood ends as the immense power escaped from my tiny body. There were even beams of bright yellow rays shooting out of the pores of my skin!

Everything happened so quickly and suddenly that I didn't have time to react. I only managed to capture this shot of the entire epic moment before the lens of my camera was shattered too...

And just as quickly and suddenly as it happened, within a couple of seconds, everything went back to normal. Well, almost everything. Instinctively, I rushed over to my mirror to check on my beloved hair. Only to find that I couldn't find a single strand of hair on my body except for my eyebrows! All the hair from my airpits, my head and even where the sun doesn't shine had disappeared!

That surge of yellow power must have burnt all my hair clean off my body, leaving me with a naked, hairless, pink but shiny bald head!

I was so angry that I punched the wall of my room. But the wall didn't move. That was because the entire block shifted 50cm from its original position. It was only then that I realised I had been blessed with something great. Something so powerful that even I could not imagine the results of wielding such power.

And that's how I became the hero that I am today. The hero that everyone calls...


Disclaimer: Believing the photos and comments posted above this disclaimer is like believing that I was the the Dad who discovered a cheap hair growth method that may bring down the hair transplant industry.

So the real reason for me posting this obviously fake post is to get back at this website that had used a photo that I had previously posted online, [without any source credits or approval from me] photoshopped in green splats on my forehead [again without any approval or attempt to contact me] and daringly use the photo as part of a facebook ad promoting their website.

I only got to know about this thanks to a heads-up from @lnelson via Twitter. [Thanks again Nelson!]

I immediately dropped the company a private facebook message [since they didn't have any official email address on their facebook or website] asking them to take down the ad.

Yes, I know i missed out point 4, but that's beside the point.

I waited for more than a day, and have not gotten any response from them up to now, so I decided to fight fire with fire. At first I was contemplating  if I should do a fake review on their product, but I realised that they are more of an health/beauty blog that has some shady clickbait links to more ads. [And not to mention their last post was on 13 July 2015]

So the only next logical thing that came to my mind was to do up this blog post to troll their website. Personally I have nothing against their website, but I am quite pissed about the fact that they used my photo [and photoshopped it to make the photo look relevant to their ad] without my permission as clickbait to their website.

I wouldn't even have minded if it was just a link to a blog post about "20 ways to style your hair" [at least that was relevant to my photo] and if they had credited the source of my photo properly.

But going out of their way to photoshop those green splats and saying that I am a dad? That's too much for even someone of my [non-existent] reputation to take.

Always remember to credit your sources and don't try to pass off other people's content as your own. You will get caught someday.

And no, I am definitely not a dad yet. [One Punchline Man strikes again!]

Life lessons from my favourite story: The Tortoise and the Hare

Image taken from google search

Everyone has heard of this story. The story where a hare challenged a tortoise to a race, and because he got cocky and took a nap, ended up losing the race to his slow and steady competitor.

Well, almost everyone knows that this story is a motivational story. And indeed it is. Just that I don't see it the way most people see it. We encourage people that it's ok to go slow and steady, just as long as you don't stop. But in today's context, I believe that this story teaches a very different set of morals.

1. Slow and steady wins the race. Fast and steady wins the race.

Image taken from google search

We all know that the only reason why the hare lost the race is because he got complacent and took a nap under that tree. But had he been a hardworking and motivated hare and just sprinted all the way to the finish line, there is no way in hell that the tortoise would have ever managed to beat him.

So the moral of the story shouldn't be "Slow and steady wins the race", but "Fast and steady wins the race." And that is so true in today's society, where everything is moving at a blazing pace, as long as you are not fast enough, you can be sure that someone is going to overtake you.

2. Both talent and effort are equally important.
Many people always say that hard work beats talent. Well, as we can see from the corrected quote above, this is only true if talent doesn't put in enough effort. Take this chart for example.

The Hare does pretty well in the talent department when it comes to racing. Just that he didn't put in enough effort. But even so, he only just barely lost to the tortoise. Imagine if the hare had woken up just a little earlier, or just put in another 10-20% more effort, he would have still easily beat his slow and steady challenger.

So the moral of the story here is that in order to excel at something, you need to first know whether you have the talent for it. Yes, you can be good at it purely through hard work, but all it takes is for a talented hare with 30% effort to leave you eating his dust.

3. Choose the battles that you know you can win.

Image taken from google search

The hare is actually a pretty cunning fella. He challenged the tortoise to a contest that he knew he would most probably win. He knew his talent, as well as his opponent's lack of talent, and chose a race which gave him a clear unfair advantage. The tortoise was probably just too dumb or too cocky to see it.

Why didn't the hare choose to compete in a "who can stay at this spot for the longest time" contest? Or even a "Who can take the most number of pebbles thrown at him" challenge? Because he was smart enough to know that racing would be the battle that would be easiest for him to win.

4. Luck is more important than you think.

Image taken from google search

After understanding the 3 lessons above, we can clearly see that the Hare was actually the real winner in the brains department. I attribute the tortoise's freak win to just pure dumb luck. Had the hare managed to wake up just a few minutes earlier, or had the tortoise tripped over an unseen rock just before the finish line, we wouldn't be telling the story the way we are telling it right now.

In singular events like this, lady luck plays a very important part in deciding the outcome. Heck, the hare could have been putting in 100% from the start of the race, but caught a cramp from the get-go, and Mr tortoise would have still won the race.

The power of lady luck only diminishes when the something is repeated enough times to cancel out the freak outcomes. Had they repeated the exact same race 99 more times, how many more races would you think Mr tortoise would have won?

Image taken from google search

The same goes for life in general. Unlike Mario, we don't get to "lose a life" and get a second chance to reply the entire scene again. Life is a sequence of "touch and go"s. Every chance you get in life is your only chance to do it under those current circumstances.

So have an open mind and make full use of every opportunity that life throws upon you. Find your talent and wow the world with it. Don't aim to be like the tortoise who never gives up. Aim to be the hare that puts in 100% effort, leaving his opponents in his dust.

Image taken from google search

Alphabet Soup

It's been a while since Google became a subsidiary of the Alphabet, and I had this post sitting in the my drafts for the longest time. Alphabet is probably going to acquire a couple more companies over the next few years, so I figured why don't I come up with my own list of tech companies that they might take under their wing?

Heck, maybe Alphabet's CEO may even get inspired by this listing. We might even be changing our traditional alphabet song in time to come.

A - Apple : It's Apple. Need I say more?

B - Bloomberg : Who doesn't love business news?

C - CISCO : With so much on the line, they would definitely need to invest in high-end security

D - Dropbox : Easy file-sharing for all their employees? Why not?

E - eBay : One of the largest online shopping platforms

F - Facebook : The world's most social media

G - Google : The first mover

H - Hewlett-Packard [HP] : You'll need quality hardware to support all these tech companies

I - IBM : Another trusted quality brand when it comes to hardware

J - Joomla! : A customisble CMS platform that is all the rage now

K - Kickstarter : With major investors like Warren Buffett heading the wings, a start-up investment company would definitely be a logical step

L - LINE : With so many companies and employees across so many regions, instant messaging is a must.

M - Microsoft : What? You expect all your employees to be running on LINUX?

N - Netflix : One of the world's most watched websites. 

O - Oracle : Data. Data. Data.

P - Pinterest : An interesting place to discover new places and ideas

Q - Quantcast : Who better to analyze the billions and billions of customers that you have?

R - Razer : Gamers who design for gamers.

S - Snapchat : Apart from oogling all the inappropriate snaps, it's also one of the biggest mobile photo apps in the world, and still gaining popularity.

T - Tinder : The mobile, M18 version of Sex definitely sells in the Internet.

U - Uber : Transport won't be a problem if you have so all the Uber drivers and taxis at your disposal

V - Virgin : The Virgin group of companies never fail to excite with their less-than-normal ways

W - Whatsapp : Another mobile instant messaging app that is vital for constant communication

X - Xerox : 3 words. Printing and copying

Y - YouTube : The world's biggest free to air video channel, where you can literally find a video about ANYTHING

Z - Zuji : Company trips? Team building? Achievement vacations? Where better to go to find cheap flights and accommodation?

If Alphabet starts buying up these companies, I'm definitely going to invest in their stocks...

Sponsored Post: N.E.mation!10 is looking for you!

Ever since my experience in N.E.mation!8, I've developed a new-found respect for people in the animation industry. It's not as easy as you think and many of these people are crazily talented when it comes to art and drawing!

This year, N.E.mation! is back for its 10th season, and showing no signs of slowing down. For the uninitiated, N.E.mation! is a digital competition organised by Nexus for youths to express their thoughts on Total Defence.

Participating teams will get a chance to turn their story into an actual broadcast quality animation clip that will be screened on free-to-air television! And don't worry if you don't have any experience in animation, because there will be professionals and coaches to guide you along the way!

You might even win yourself a fully sponsored overseas trip to USA to visit a renowned animation studio! But don't just take my word for it. Check out this video of last season's winners on their trip to the USA!

This year, N.E.mation!10 promises to be another awesome season with the theme centered  around "Together We Keep Singapore Strong". So what are you waiting for? Gather your friends and register now for an experience like no other!

How to register:

1. Form a team of 3 to 4 students from your school

2. Head on over to to register online

3. Submit your story ideas on the theme "Together We Keep Singapore Strong" by 16 August 2015

4. You're done!

It's that simple! Remember, the deadline for all story submissions is on 16 August 2015.

For those of you who are more picture-oriented...

So get your creative juices flowing and you might be on your way to creating your very own animation clip and winning a free trip to USA! Check out for more details!

Sponsored Post: Tiger Beer's Unofficial Official SG50 Party

It's not a party until the booze starts flowing. And who better to throw an unofficial official SG50 party than Singapore's unofficial official local beer? This year, Tiger Beer is going no holds barred by throwing its own epic National Day party, and letting the people decide on what they want to see at the party.

Still confused? No worries, watch this video and everything will be explained faster than you can say "It's Tiger Time".

Be part of the largest crowd-sourced party of SG50 by visiting Tiger Beer's Unofficial Official SG50 Party Microsite and voting for your favourite party highlights, or even contributing your own awesome ideas. Imagine a unique and crazy party with a truly local flavour where you get to decide on the attractions!

Held at the newly-refurbished, iconic Capitol Theatre. party-goers can expect crazy builds ranging from giant "Chope tissue packet" beanbags to chilli crab fountains to ice kachang sculptures. The possibilities are endless! You name it, they build it.

So what are you waiting for? Head on down to Tiger Beer's Unofficial Official SG50 Party Microsite and start voting now! Voting closes on 19 July, and that's the only way you'll be able to get yourself tickets to the most coveted SG50 party of the year!

Not a fan of online voting? No worries. Tiger Beer has you covered. Those above the age of 18 can head on down to the 2 mobile polling stations located at Knightsbridge on 4 July or One Raffles Place on 9 July and cast your votes there!

And as if that wasn't enough, as the sweet topping on your ice ka-chang, the party will be headlined by not one, but two international music acts! Get ready to party to catchy party anthems performed by The Griswolds, a 4-piece indie-rock band hailing from Sydney, Australia!

To blow the roof off the house, Tiger Beer has also brought in a surprise international music act! Here's a hint: They are an internationally-celebrated British alternative band. Keep your eyes and ears peeled for the great reveal!

I already know what I'm voting for [and most of them are food-related]. What do you want to see at the party? Head on down to Tiger Beer's Unofficial Official SG50 Party Microsite and start voting now!

Going out in style

Image take from google search

Quite some time ago, some of my friends and I had a conversation on what would be the coolest way to go. And by go, we meant "cause of unnatural death". As we were seated in the banquet hall, the very first contribution [and still my favourite] was "Death by falling chandelier".

So last night, I decided that I should build a list of the coolest and wackiest ways to kick the bucket that would probably get you remembered for life. America has "101 ways to leave a gameshow". Let's make "101 ways to leave this world". And apparently, many of these have happened in real life... Wow. Just. Wow.

1.Death by falling chandelier

2. Death by falling fruit [coconut/durian/jackfruit etc]

3. Death by brainfreeze [definitely a cooool way to go]

4. Death by being run over by an ambulance [oh the irony]

5. Death by fatroll suffocation

6. Death by birthday surprise [e.g. heart attack]

7. Death by blunt trauma from a spoon

8. Death by choking on a cockroach [that's just gross]

9. Death by flying fire hydrant [ouch]

10. Death by winning the lottery [pretty much the same as no. 6]

11. Death by choking on your wedding cake [maybe that's why fake ones are more popular these days]

12. Death by a cow falling through your roof [Probably tried to jump over the moon and failed]

13. Death by demonstration of unbreakable window glass

14. Death by drowning in human waste [yucks]

15. Death by dancing yourself to death

16. Death by golf club impalement [who says golf is a boring game?]

17. Death by sexhaustion [probably the best way to go] - contributed by Goh Yong Wei

18. Death by semen drowning [sperm bank robbers?] - contributed by Kiyomi

What other awesome ways would you like to go out with a bang with? Comment below and I'll add them to the list [with proper credits of course]

And here's a cool song about it if you prefer cartoons:

How to plug in that USB right every time!

Image taken from google search

Everyone knows that all USB plugs have 3 sides:

The wrong side, the opposite-still-wrong-side, and the elusive flip-3-times-to-reveal correct side.

But here's a little hack on how to always find the right side of a USB plug on the first try EVERY TIME.

If you take a look at your USB plug, you would notice that there are 2 holes on each side of the plug. One side has the holes covered.

While the other side has the holes that let you see all the way to the back of the metal port.

Now, if you didn't already know this, here's how to get a USB plug to be in the correct orientation every single time you want to plug it into a USB port. All you need to do is to make sure the side with the holes that you see all the way to the back of the metal port is facing upwards [i.e. towards your ceiling], and you're suddenly a mini David Cop-A-Feel when it comes to plugging in USBs!

Or, you can just make sure the USB logo is facing up.
[Although not all plugs have that logo on them]

My Unpopular Opinion

Image taken from google seach

The V Word
Whenever people talk about love and relationships, one topic will always come up. Sex.

There are those that believe you should only be having sex after you are married, while others believe that sex is a way of life even during singlehood.

I'm not here to voice my views about sex directly, but more specifically, the V word. No, not that V word. The other V word. Virginity.

The Opinion
From ancient civilization to modern times, a female's virginity has always been regarded as something sacred. A virgin is typically regarded as a pure, innocent, clean and well-raised daughter. Parents [especially the older, Asian ones] will always tell their daughters: "It's important that you save your virginity for your husband. Sex is a taboo before marriage!"

Now, here's my unpopular opinion that doesn't sit well with many elders. Virginity should not be considered as something sacred. In fact, in today's modern world, I find it more of a hindrance as opposed to a tool to find your true love.

Image taken from google search

"Catching" a Partner
There was a reason why cavemen back in prehistoric times were so successful in keeping their wives. I mean, have you ever heard of a prehistoric couple who got divorced? For those of you who don't know how our ancestors managed to catch themselves a wife, well, they literally did.

If a single caveman saw a cavewoman [cavelady?] whom they fancied, they would grab a club, bash the poor girl on the head, and drag her back to his cave, have a good time with her [semi-conscious body] and take her as his "home-prisoner".

Now, I know in modern times, this would be considered kidnap and rape, but the interesting thing is, because the caveman would already be treating his "home-prisoner" as his partner [albeit one that wasn't allowed to leave the cave], the female would soon find it in herself to love her man. Reason being that he satisfies all her primary needs: putting a shelter over her head and bringing food to the table. But probably the most important factor is that she knows that she has already lost her virginity to him, and since he treats her well, well, why not?

Image taken from google search

The Virgin Blindfold
This system worked well if the man was responsible enough to take good care of the lady. However, back to modern day society, how many stories have we heard of girlfriends or wives sticking to their boyfriends or husbands like glue even though the whole world [except her] can see that she would be so much better off without him?

Physically abusive boyfriends, gambling addicts, control freaks. These are just a few examples of stories from my real life friends who were too blinded by love and lost of Virginity to face the truth that their partner was destroying their lives. It took them years to finally find the courage to break up with their previous partners, but when asked again, they said that if given a second chance, they would have dropped them in a heartbeat.

Virginity is like a blindfold. If you keep holding on to it like some sacred statue, you will always turn a blind eye to the obvious truths that everyone else around you can see. Instead, why not let go of that blindfold so that you'll be able to make a more unbiased decision on who you would want to spend the rest of your life with?

Image taken from google search

Virginity is not sacred. Making Love is.
This doesn't mean that I'm encouraging kids to go around having sex openly and freely. Coming from a very strict and traditional family, I still put a lot of value on the morals thought to me where ever they make sense.

To me, it doesn't matter how many times you have had sex before, or how many previous partners you have had sex with before. Every single time you have or want to make love, it should be a conscious decision, and with somebody, who, at that point in time, you truly feel that you will be able to spend the rest of your life with. If you're not sure, then it's best to keep them out of your pants until you are.

Notice that I didn't use the word sex in the subtitle. Because this is not sex, this is called Making Love. And it takes some level of maturity to understand the difference between the two. So kids, don't try this at home. Or at work. Or in school. Or in... Just don't try it.

Image taken from google search

The Big Difference
Sex is just the physical act of having sexual intercourse with another person. There is little or no emotional attachment involved. Making love is when two people who have very strong emotional attachment for each other give themselves to one another. Technically, you can be having sex with anyone or anything, but you can only make love with the person who really owns your heart.

The gratification you get from sex is also many times less than what you get from making love. This is why people who go for sex can never seem to get enough of it, but people who truly make love never understand why others would ever want sex.

Image taken from google search

The Grand Finale
After saying so much, the point I actually want to make is that I feel that it's ok to lose your virginity as a teenager or youth even before marriage. Of course I still advise everyone to think long and hard [pun intended] before you actually decide to give your virginity to someone. Not because it is sacred, but because it is going to lock you in, physically and emotionally, with this person for a long time.

But if and once you move on, you will actually be better equipped to judge for yourself whether or not your next partner is really going to be your soulmate.

Get your virginity out of the way is key to finding the right person to spend the rest of your life with.

Queuing to Pay Our Last Respects to Mr Lee Kuan Yew: A Humbling Experience

As our founding father Mr Lee Kuan Yew lies in state at Parliament House, thousands of Singaporeans queue up for hours to pay our last respects to this great man. Mint Leong and myself went down yesterday afternoon to join the queue and here is summary of our experience, as well as some suggestions for our fellow Singaporeans who are planning to go down in the next few days.

#LKYQueue Tip 01: Find out where the end of the queue is at. We found that the best way was to keep tabs on social media platforms like Facebook, Twitter and Instagram to see where the latest "start of queue" is currently at.

#LKYQueue Tip 02: There is a priority queue for the elderly above 60 years of age, families with young children and persons with special needs. Go straight to the Padang to join this priority queue. It's shorter, but you'll still have to queue for at least an hour or so.

The queue to get to the actual queue
Image edited from

3.00 pm: We arrived at City Hall and started looking for the tail of the queue. We spotted part of the queue going around St. Andrews Cathedral and traced the queue back to the entrance of City Hall MRT station. However, we were directed by the ushers to walk through the open gates of St. Andrews Cathedral and join the queue from there.

As we walked on the road leading through St. Andrews Cathedral, we were quite lost on where to go next, as there were only sparse groups of people walking along that path and they were taking different routes. We walked through St. Andrews Cathedral and spotted another part of the queue on the other end, and after tracing the queue backwards, we finally managed to get ourselves into the queue. Or rather, the queue to get to the actual queue.

#LKYQueue Tip 03: Go with some friends so that you can have someone to talk to while waiting. It's gonna be a long wait.

#LKYQueue Tip 04: If you are intending to join the queue in the afternoon, bring an umbrella along with you as some parts of the queue can get really scorching due to the afternoon/evening sun.

3.30pm: We were moving around St. Andrews Cathedral. The queue was moving at a slow but steady pace. Most of the people around us were quite considerate, leaving enough breathing space for everyone and patiently moving along with the queue.

Along the way, there were kind volunteers who were giving out free drinks and sweets [on their own accord I assume] to the people in the queue. Thank you to all the volunteers for your acts of kindness.

3.45pm: We reached the War Memorial Park. From here, things started to turn a little hectic.

Orange line: Our queue
Blue lines: Other queues
Image edited from google maps

As we made our way around the War Memorial Park, the queue started spreading from a 2-3 person queue to a 6-7 person queue. Where ever there was empty space at the side of the queue, people from behind would just trickle off and form their own new lines by the side of the main queue.

Also, not sure why, but it seemed that there were multiple queues throughout the War Memorial Park. While we were queuing around the circumference of the park, we could see that within the park, there were some queues too. And even worse than that, some of the queues were cutting across the grass of the park, especially at the corners of the park. Seems like Singaporeans really do like to cut corners.

#LKYQueue Tip 05: Keep to your current queue. Don't try to take shortcuts.

#LKYQueue Tip 06: Keep onto the pavement! The grass are innocent! Don't trample over them. We are humans, not cows.

4.05pm: The queue kept getting wider and wider. And when we arrived at the underpass to cross over to the other side of Raffles Ave, the queue had already transformed itself to a free for all.

Queue? What queue?

Everyone was trying to squeeze into the underpass to get across the road. It felt like I was at the IT Show or going home from the National Stadium after the National Day Parade. I'm quite sure the inside of the underpass was already jam packed with people. And we were not moving at all.

Luckily our Singapore Traffic Police came to the rescue. They stopped any more people from going into the underpass and waited for the crowd on the other side of the underpass to clear up. They then managed to stop the traffic along Raffles Ave for a few minutes to allow the crowd to cross the road instead of having to use the underpass. This eased up the crowd at the entrance of the underpass and we managed to get moving again. Kudos to the officers for coming up with this idea.

4.15pm: Once across the road, things started to get a lot more organised. There were proper barricades, signboards and first aid stations set up along the path, and the queue started to move at a steady pace again. There were even ushers informing the elderly to keep right to the priority queue.

4.30pm: After 1.5 hours of queuing, we have finally reached... the start of the queue to Parliament House. Snaking queues within the barricades could be seen as far as the eye could see across the entire Padang. And at the entrance of the queue to the Padang, there were stations set up to distribute bottled water, biscuits and even umbrellas. Yes umbrellas. Of course, they have people and signage to urge the public to return these umbrellas to be recycled at the end of the queue.

It was pretty heartwarming to see the amount of effort and kindness coming from fellow Singaporeans when we are usually labelled as Kiasu and Kiasi. There were even the recognizable green tents set up by our Singapore Army Force to help shelter some parts of the queue from the elements.

5.30pm: As we snaked through Padang, the queue behind us was seemingly getting longer and longer as more and more people came down after their office hours to pay their last respects to Mr Lee Kuan Yew.

And within the queue, people were getting more impatient and pushy, as the queue had suddenly stopped moving about half an hour ago. [Later in the evening news, we found that that this was because of some international delegates who came down to pay their respects to Mr Lee.]

Our section of the queue was originally quite spacious and there were even people sitting down on the grass while waiting. But the queue behind us seemed to be jam packed with people. And as expected, these people soon pushed found their way into our section of the queue. Our comfort soon turned into discomfort as we were soon shoulder to shoulder with other queuers, and left with only a small space to stand.

#LKYQueue Tip 07: Leave LOTS OF SPACE while queuing. More space means more comfort and more breeze for everyone. How much time can you save by squeezing everyone to the front? 10 minutes? I rather swap that for comfort.

#LKYQueue Tip 08: Be patient and don't try to squeeze into any gaps in the queue you can find. You'll just end up being packed like sardines in a very uncomfortable position.

#LKYQueue Tip 09: Staying by the sides of the queue, next to the barricades helps to keep cool and minimises the amount of pushing and shoving you receive. Just take extra care while walking along so as not to trip over the stands of the barricades and not to get jabbed in the hips while turning along the edge of the queues.

6.15pm: The queue had started to move again, and the heat started to die down as the evening drew closer. Although Parliament House was within sight, we knew that it would still be some time before we would manage to step foot in it.

6.45pm: We had queued past Esplanade Park, through an underpass that went under Fullerton Road [which we never knew existed before], and now moving along beside the Singapore River. It was actually a good chance to take in the sights and sounds of Singapore. We are usually so busy with work and family that we seldom have the chance to slow down and [literally] smell the flowers along the way.

#LKYQueue Tip 10: Take the chance to enjoy the green garden city and the cleansed [as compared to many years ago] Singapore River that Mr Lee Kuan Yew had so strongly pushed for.

7.15pm: As we got nearer to Parliament House there were televisions set up by the side of the queue replaying Mr Lee Kuan Yew's historic moments. The sides of the queue was also lined with the well-wishes written by the public on the white cards.

#LKYQueue Tip 11: And if you have not written your well wishes, not to worry, there are ushers handing out the cards and pens for you to do so. Further down the line there are collection boxes for you to drop your completed cards into.

#LKYQueue Tip 12: You can also familiarize yourself with the white orchids named after the late Mr. and Mrs. Lee that are lining the base of the panels that the cards are displayed on.

Again, at the point in the queue, people tend to start pushing and squeezing their way through, as the queue snakes on for what seems like eternity. I would like to urge everyone to keep their cool, and just patiently move along while maintaining some space between you and the person in front of you. There's no hurry. Everyone will get a chance to pay your last respects.

Image taken from

7.30pm: We have reached the final checkpoint, the security check station. There are 2 rows, 1 for persons without bags, and another for persons with bags. As you would expect, most of the people queuing would have a bag or 2 with them.

You will need to put your bag through a scanning device, while you yourself will have to walk through a metal detector. Much like the airport scanning, I would advise everyone to place all their belongings in their bags before walking through the metal detector. Oh, and do take out your iPads and tablets from your bag. [I'm assuming that they might interfere with the scanning of the items in your bag]

#LKYQueue Tip 13: Leave your sharp objects at home. Items such as scissors and pen-knives are not allowed to be brought into Parliament House [for obvious reasons], and will be confiscated during the security check. [They probably would not give it back to you after you exit too]

7.40pm: The queue is moving along outside Parliament House. The Singapore flag at half-mast atop the Parliament House is a jarring reminder of the harsh reality. At the entrance, there is a "No Photography" sign pasted at the side of the door.

7.50pm: We finally got to pay our respects to the late Mr Lee Kuan Yew. Don't bother trying to take a look inside the coffin as the only way you would probably be able to see anything is if you were 2m tall. Instead, feel free to take half a step back and bow to the great man.

#LKYQueue Tip 14: Contrary to some of the reports, they don't actually stop people from bowing as long as the queue keeps moving.

#LKYQueue Tip 15: Please show some respect. Do not attempt to take any photos once you are past the door with the "No Photography" sign. It's the most basic form of respect that you can give to any passing person.

8.00pm: After exiting Parliament House, the atmosphere was one of solace and solemn appreciation. Many were teary eyed and sniffing, but at the same time grateful that they had a chance to say a final thank you and goodbye to the Founding Father of Singapore.

Total time taken: 5 hours.

Our backs and legs would probably ache for the next few days.

If I could rewind the clock, would I do it again? Definitely.

It was a wonderful experience and also a good way to experience the good and ugly side of Singaporeans, to take in the sights and sounds of Singapore and it's the least we could do for all the Mr Lee Kuan Yew has done for our little red dot. Thank you sir.