The End of the World... Or is it?

21 December 2012. It's only 1 month away. The end of the world.

Quit school, quit your job, leave home, go round doing silly things that you always wanted to do, then feel like an idiot when you wake up in the morning of 22 December 2012. While your at it, here's a list of 10 things you can try to complete if you still believe the world is going to end in 1 month:



1. Compete with a "FREE HUGS" guy with a "$2.00 DELUXE HUGS" sign

2. Put a desk in an elevator. When people come in, ask them if they have an appointment

3. Go to McDonalds and ask for directions to Burger King

4. Put a stick-it note on a drive-through microphone that says "Speaker broken. Please yell"

5. Page yourself over the office intercom. Do not disguise your voice

6. Phone someone and tell them "I can't talk right now!"

7. Pay for something that costs more than $100 with only coins

8. Wrap the middle section of the toilet seat with clear wrap, then leave the seat down

9. Go to the store and buy some candy, rope, duct tape and a knife

10. Hire 2 private investigators. Get them to follow each other


The main reason for all this hype is due to the fact that it is the last day of the Mayan calendar, the end of a 5 125-year-long cycle that the Mayans followed. Following this, there are many different theories on how the world will end in a month's time. Most of them are based on some kind of super catastrophe that will wipe the entire world population of the face of the planet, much like what happened to our fellow friends the Dinosaurs.

Some people believe that we will go out in style, from a wayward comet or planet crashing into Earth, wiping all of us out in a single blow.

Others believe in a more down to Earth cleansing via natural disasters like combination of earthquakes, volcano eruptions and tsunamis.

Another theory goes that there will be a switch in the earth's polarity, causing the continents to rearrange themselves.

Yet another says that as a result of some interaction with the black hole at the centre of the galaxy, the sun will release a pulse of light and heat, called a solar maximum, that will burn through everything, much like the movie 2012.

Personally, I believe that the 21st of December 2012 is going to a rather disappointing, uneventful day.

The only possible chance of a real global apocalypse is if someone presses that big red button that says "Do Not Push", and a couple of nukes are launched, sparking the beginning of World War 3, and the end of humanity as we know it.


Heck, even NASA has a write-up on why the world won't end on 21 Dec 2012. Read more about it here:



In any case, should it happen that we were to only have 24 hours before the world ends, what would you do amidst all the chaos? Here's my hour-by-hour plan on how I would spend the last 24 hours of my life:



Hour 0 to Hour 1: Using whatever materials available, I'll try to make something that may be found by the next generation of intelligent lifeforms in the future. It would probably be something physical like a hand written message in a bottle that I would bury somewhere nearby. My message would include a short write-up on today's date and how we are supposedly going to be wiped out. It would also include my name and a photo of myself, stating that I am the ruler of this planet, just to troll the generation that finds my message.


Hour 1 to Hour 2: After writing my troll message in a bottle, I would then spend the next hour searching for a suitable location to bury it. It should be somewhere easily accessible but yet stable enough not to get destroyed during the apocalypse. Maybe somewhere like one of the underground bunkers in Fort Canning. Now where did I put my playground shovel?


Hour 2 to Hour 5: Fooood! Hey, even dying people have to eat right? If not, where would we find the energy to finish the rest of this list? I would spend this time trying to find my some of my favourite foods. Burger King breakfast, Black Pepper Crab, Sambal Kang Kong, Authentic Thai Tom Yam Soup, Santouka Ramen... Mmmmm. Obviously by this time, there would be widespread panic and chaos everywhere, so undoubtedly, most of these places would have already been ransacked closed for business. If all else fails, we can always still have some tasty home-cooked Ai Xing Maggi Mee... *Slurps*


Hour 5 to Hour 6: Communicate my appreciation for all those people who are important to me. Hopefully the telephone networks are still up and running during this time. If they were, I would individually send personalised messages to all my closest friends and family. Thanking them for being a part of my life and wishing them all the best. I would also advise them to spend their last hours with the people that really matter in their life. After all my messages have been sent, it's time to do the unthinkable... Turn off my phone and put it away. The last few hours should be 100% dedicated to the people who really matter to you. Be it your family, friends or partner. Having your phone around you would only be a major distraction.


Hour 6 to Hour 8: Family time. Gather my family members together, express some love for each and every one of them. You only have these last few hours on this planet. It's time to reconcile any grudges that you may have with your parents and/or siblings. I believe that family is one of the most important factors in any person's life. And there should be no grudges between family members when it's time to leave.


Hour 8 to Hour 10: [From here on, all the items in this list should be done together with your loved ones] Lie in bed with your loved one for some heart-to-heart pillow talk. Talk about all the good times that you've had, as well as all the what ifs if the world didn't have to end today. Heck, 2 hours may not even be enough!


Hour 10 to Hour 11: Dress up! If we're going out, we might as well go out in style! While others are scrambling about, I would take my time to wash up, put on my smartest outfit, wax and spray my hair and put on my favourite cologne. Hey, it's my last few hours to be able to show off my looks!


Hour 11 to 14: Have a romantic stroll by the beach. It doesn't matter whether its 3pm in the after or 3am in the morning, a hand-in-hand stroll down the beach is always romantic. Take your time to enjoy each other's company and learn to take in all the sights and sounds from your surroundings. East Coast Park is highly recommended here.


Hour 14 to Hour 16: Have a nice meal together with your partner. If you are lucky enough to find a romantic candlelight restaurant that is still open for business, good for you. But more likely than not, you would probably be having something simple with your partner like sitting by the side of the road at one of those abandoned street cafes eating some simple bread and drinking water out of a water bottle bought taken from a nearby abandoned NTUC. It's not the food or ambience that counts, it's the quality of the company.


Hour 16 to 18: Take a walk through a deserted Orchard Road. When in the world can you see probably the busiest street in Singapore totally void of human traffic? This may be your only chance to see and feel what it's like to be in a uptown shopping area with nobody around. Plus point: Most of the shops would probably be left abandoned too! So if you spot something nice, you can always have an instant makeover at zero cost!


Hour 18 to 20: Have a quick nap in a furniture mall. Try out all the different kinds of beds and mattresses they have to offer. [Water beds are fun!] Find the most comfy bed in that store and just get a 1 or 2 hour power nap to recharge a little energy. But remember to set your alarm clock! You don't want to be caught snoozing when during the end of the world happens!


Hour 20 to 22: Make a few new random friends. Go up to anyone you see and befriend them. Ask them how they are spending their last hours. Find out about their life stories, their celebrations and their regrets. Tell them about yours. You'll be amazed at how much a person will open up to any listening party when his time is nearly up.


Hour 22 to 23: Propose. Yes, propose. No ring necessary here. During this time of sadness and woe, even the tiniest spark of happiness would mean the world to your partner. Just find a secluded spot, grab a wild flower or something that remotely resembles a ring, get down on one knee and pop the question. Chances are, you are going to get a positive answer.


Hour 23 to 24: Find a location with a great view of the surroundings so that you can take in the end of the world in all its glory. Some ideal spots would be in a cable car on the way to Sentosa, One Altitude at the top of UOB Plaza or at the peak of Mount Faber if you're a nature lover. Standing at these highgrounds, you should be able to see the end coming and spread your arms wide open, shouting your final war cry "Come at me bro!!"


Alternate Ending: Another idea would be to be having some awesome sex while the end of the world is coming. Time it well enough and you might just end off together with the rest of the world [literally] with a big, fat orgasm!!!


How would you spend your last 24 hours you have to live on this planet??

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